theyellowbrickroad:

money doesnt buy happiness but i cant say id be upset in the least bit if i suddenly inherited 5 million dollars

friendlycloud:

hitlervevo:

why the fuck cant we text the police

lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you

Relevant

I just had to email my professor asking him for directions to his room because I couldn’t navigate the bloody building his office’s in.

#ConeOfShame

I applaud Jes for besting A&F and Mr. Jeffries. Jeffries is the kind of genetically-engineered mutt inhabiting the Hunger Games arenas. He is selfish, egotistical, and so enamored with his own self-defined “coolness” that he lacks any human personality traits at all.
 Ha. Haha. Hahahaha.

shutupmerlin:

My grandmother grew up in this tiny village in Barbados, and she was the only kid in the village to have a cricket bat. She used to play with all the boys, but then they started stealing the bat every time she bought it out of the house and saying that she couldn’t play because girls shouldn’t play sport. So one day she invited them to come play cricket, then set fire to the bat and made them watch it burn, so none of them could play cricket anymore. She was 11.   


> Misha’s like a herp derp puppy!
> NO. Misha’s not a herp-derp puppy. He’s like a large herp derp dog that has extra limbs and cackles into the night.

5 weeks of not doing laundry, and I’m wearing a swimsuit and a random T-shirt. I have no boxers so I’m doubling up.
Gems from the 4th floor, cont.
Here’s an idea - if the thief’s a klepto, put a banana in the frige. He’ll steal it. Then put another. He’ll steal that too. Then put another. Repeat. In a few hours he’ll start feeling the same effects as a laxative. Take a picture and you’ve got your food thief.
Brilliant ideas from 4th floor for anti-stealing mechanisms.

someonecalledmefamous:

mu5icliz:

germansam:

tokyosluts:

Sleeping is nice because youre not actually dead and youre not awake so its a win-win situation

It’s like being dead without the commitment.

an open relationship with death

death with benefits